"But not because she's a woman..." - The Kentologist

I follow the Lean In Facebook page for daily news, tips, and articles related to the empowerment of women.
Last Friday, Lean In posted an article, "Sheryl Sandberg & Adam Grant on Women Doing 'Office Housework".  Activities like planning the office party or taking notes would fall under the office housework category and the article explains the gender stereotypes that women are subject to in the workplace.  I'm a living witness to the claims, having felt frustrated before for dedicating countless hours to my job, being away from my family as a result, and having it overlooked.

However, that same day I headed into work for a planning and brainstorming session with my boss, who is a male, and my two other male counterparts.  At this point, still early in my early career, I rarely think twice about me being the only female sitting at the table.  It's now become the norm.  The meeting was the first that I'd had with all three gentlemen together, but I think was necessary for our team dynamics.

As my boss was explaining an idea that one of the two other gentleman had about some display boards, I spoke out to give a suggestion. It wasn't anything grandiose...just a way to improve the visual aesthetic.

"Latoya! How about you take this project?!"

".... .... um..."

Let me note here that the Latoya a year ago would have immediately said 'yes', no hesitation.  My response even surprised me!

My co-worker, who brought up the idea initially, chimed in, "I'll work with Latoya on it."

Whether he realized what was going on or not, that was the most perfect response he could have given at that  moment.  I hesitated to accept that task because 1) it was my co-worker's idea and I know I would feel robbed if it was snatched away from me and given to someone else and 2) because, well...because I wanted to ensure that this task was given to me for a better reason other than "because women are good at that kind of stuff".

I took a deep a breath and put on a smile... "The reason I hesitated to say yes was because I just read an article about women doing 'office housework' and I thought it was pretty ironic that I'd be assigned to this today.  I don't have a problem working on it though. It will get done." :)

In my head, I'm going "ohhh, you've messed up now! He's going to be on pins and needles around you now and think you're going to accuse him of being sexist." It was a risky comment to make, especially with the others in the room.

My boss smiled and held his head in slight embarrassment, but he was a good sport about it: "I feel like I need to go to a sensitivity class now."  I should also mention that this was the first time this had happened; my manager is and has always been open to all of our ideas and suggestions. This story was just well-timed. (Here's hoping I don't get fired lol).
In his notes, he assigned the other gentleman "and Latoya, but not because she's a woman." We all shared a laugh.

I did my best to reassure him that I was being facetious and that I truly didn't mind whatever task he assigned me to. As a supervisor myself, I understand that work is work and if it needs to be done, it doesn't matter who does it.  But to be totally truthful, I'm glad that the awareness was brought to the table, literally.

Disclaimer: This, in no way, is an invitation for women to go around challenging their superiors about any and every thing that may resemble a gender-stereotype. They do exist, yes. But to address them with guns blazing will do you more harm than good, in my opinion.  There is a time and place for everything and the way you handle these issues can make or break you in some cases.  All this is very situational (i.e., if your job title is Secretary, there's not much I can tell you: it's all in a day's work...and if you are an intern or entry-level employee, just know that we've all had to pay our dues at some point).

Think about that as you start your week.  If you are a female, make yourself aware of cases where you or another female employee are given unequal treatment. The best thing you can do is to respectfully address your observation (privately) to bring more awareness to what's going on.  If you are a male and notice that your female counterparts are being treated differently, or given tasks that are traditionally given to women, volunteer to help out.  It's a win-win for you as a team player.

Happy Monday, folks!